
Whether a lady could set up her own household depended upon a number of factors. It also depended on whether she wanted to maintain her friends and be received by Polite Society. Whether she had enough money that anyone would care was certainly an issue, as was age, and which members of her family were still living. I think that by the age of five and thirty, a lady could manage to set up her own household. But again, it depended on the factors involved and she would have to be extremely careful.
The basic rule was that ladies of marriageable age with sufficient wealth did not live separately from her family. This was for her protection (to keep her from being abducted and forced to marry or held for ransom) and to keep her reputation intact. Also, society did not want to encourage women to be independent.
If her parents or grandparents were still alive, there is no way society would accept her living separately from her family.
But let’s say you have a lady who wanted to set up her own household) after her parents and grandparents died), and she did care about what people thought. First, she would have to have an older companion. A lady with enough standing, and gravitas to appear as if she was in control of the younger lady, such as a widowed or spinster aunt. The lady would be required to have a complete household of servants from butler, housekeeper, and lady’s maid to maids and footmen. She’d also better not have anyone in her immediate family complaining about her not living with them. Unless, of course, everyone knew how impossible that person was.
Other women a lady could live with was a sister. Two famous spinster sisters of the Regency era are Mary and Agnes Berry.
Another way a lady could gain some form of independence, if she had sufficient funds, was to continuously visit other family members. She would still have to have an older companion and enough servants to keep her safe.
Lynne Connolly posted an interesting article on the Ladies of Langollen about two 18th century ladies that wanted to live together in an intellectual friendship. Lynne made the point that one of them was almost committed. For a while they were cast out of society, their families refused to see them, however, they eventually became “fashionable.” https://wellcomecollection.org/articles/the-ladies-of-llangollen/
Here is a link to the book. https://www.amazon.com/Ladies-Llangollen-study-Romantic-Friendship-ebook/dp/B005CPHSXA/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
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